2. T- minus 12 days until my birthday and I'm kinda freaking. Not really sure why. I've been practicing saying that I am 30 for the past 2 years. The reality is kicking in. I'm no spring chicken. Ha ha ha. It does serve as a good wake up call to examine where I am in life and put together for getting to where I want to be. Do you ever wake up and feel like you've wasted your life? Or the life you've lived so far? For some reason that is a HUGE fight for me. For someone who loves memories and remembering the good times, recently that has all come with a twinge of regret over feeling like I've misstepped into a Marty McFly alternate universe for the past 7 years that have put me no where near where I "should" be. Not even sure what that "should" life looks like, but somehow different than this. Sometimes it is a little haunting feeling and then other times I feel like it is being blasted on a mega speaker from the rooftops. It's a daily battle to try and convince myself that I am where God wants me...and frankly, it's a battle I often lose. Nothing like a little honesty on a Tuesday afternoon.
3. I finished out February with a poor showing on the flossing front--well, let's say I'd get a B if in high school, or a VG if in elementary school. I think I missed 4 days. But on the optimistic side, that means I flossed 22 more days than I did in January. And I even continued on into March. Sara sent me an email yesterday morning (because that is the best way to communicate with a roomie you never see) announcing her no-tv-march. Holy cow! I don't know how she's gonna do that. She does have an exception for the end of the Bachelor, because how can you go on living without knowing if Emily or Chantel gets the final rose?! {Emily! Emily! Emily!} Anyway, as a part of the life examination, I'm really trying to put my foot down and shed this ridiculous (and embarrassing) weight. So for this month it's my goal to exercise 6 out of the 7 days in the week. I have given myself the option of 45 minutes cardio or 30 minutes cardio with weights and crunches. So far I'm 2 for 2 and praying for a truck load of internal and external change. I've also started keeping a food journal. Enough is enough and after not feeling like myself for a while, not having clothes that fit and being too embarrassed to shop for more, hating all pictures, losing the little confidence I had, carrying physical evidence of selfishness and laziness for all to see.....I'm drawing the line. So there.
4. I have to go shower and get ready for a game night with some girls from my tennis team. So I'll leave you with this uh-mazing video to giggle at. Seriously. If you don't laugh, you should seriously consider having your funny bone replaced.
1 comment:
I feel like I've checked your blog each day this week and am just now seeing this! What?
This is a great great post. You are so good at translating... scratch that... interpreting (!!) your thoughts into words. You probably feel like it's long and drawn out (because you sometimes reference that feeling) but it's really quite to the point, which also must be hard because you are being so honest! Kudos to not making excuses! Wish I could be the same way... and floss my teeth more while doing it. OH, and way to go with your March resolution, I often find that when I take a break (like I have been since late Dec) it's SO hard to get into the groove again, but once I'm consistent, I have a hard time not working out and feel gross if I go any less than 2x's a week, 6x's would be even better! (I need to get back to that place)
Love you, miss you and wish more than anything I could celebrate the big 3-0 with you in person : )
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